My boss basically begged me to write this article because he thinks I’m obsessed with buttholes. I don’t realize it, on a day to day basis, but I guess I do talk about them a lot.
I remember reading something online about how guys can’t sniff a butthole without getting a major boner. I think about this a lot. Is this why guys stare at butts so much? Because they’re thinking about sniffing them? That’s so funny and weird. But really, I can fully stand behind this because one of the first things I want to do when I have a naked butthole in front of me is sniff it, and then put my tongue in it, and then try to get the owner of the butthole to let me put other things in it. I feel very lucky that I don’t have a penis because I can do all of these things and still act cool and collected without some silly flesh tube giving me away. HAHAHA. Penises. Pffft.
I bet you that people read or hear about ladies talking about buttholes and think something like “what? What could a girl possibly do to a butthole aside from just look at it and be like ‘yup, that’s a butthole.”” And I’m here to tell you that there’s a LOT we can do. Think about it like this (well I don’t even know if what I’m about to say is factual, because I don’t know much about dicks, but I’m pretty smart about life and this is what I’ve surmised): Let’s say that a guy gets all hot and bothered by sniffing a butthole, gets a boner, and then decides to do something sexual with that butthole. I’m guessing that once a boner is achieved, the guy will put some sort of goo on his boner, ram the boner in the butthole, and then feel very pleased with himself that he did something scandalous and sexy. Well, that’s lame and a big time waste of butthole. Here’s what I like to do with a pretty butthole. (I’m gonna write this out like a short play).
Pretty lady: Oh, hey, I’m gonna get naked now and you can do whatever you want with me.
Me: Oh, that’s cool. Why don’t you lay on your stomach and put your butt in the air?
Pretty lady: OK. You’re super good in bed, I can tell already.
Me: I know.
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SNL Banned Episode ~ Media Controlled Conspiracy Theory Rock ~ - NaturalNews.tv
A Banned Segment from Saturday Night Live
The 1998 Robert Smigel animated short film Conspiracy Theory Rock, part of a March 1998 TV Funhouse segment, has been removed from all subsequent airin
(Source: addtoany.com)
Mustache Madness!
VICE’s Jamie Taete has a theory that Nicki Minaj is just Jay-Z sped up. It kind of sounds insane to me, but take a listen and decide for yourself.
I was about to go to bed, then this.
